Thursday, February 12, 2015

Maybe It's Time To Stop Blogging

Lately I've done a lot of soul searching about my blog.

The blogging industry has really been changing, and I have to admit that I have seriously questioned my place in it.

I know that you don't come here for organizing tips (and if you do...sorry to let you down), cooking advice (I have cute kids pictures cooking?), fashion tips (tip: don't wear the same pair of swear pants five days in a row), exercise how tos (How To: wear tennis shoes while grocery shopping in order to track down all the little people that you brought to the store with you), or coupon suggestions (for some reason Costco would not accept my "trade a child for credit" program...it's puzzling).

I also know that I spent the last year really delving deep into an issue that was heavy on my heart, an issue that a short blog post just didn't resolve it for me: the goodness of God even in the face of the unexpected. Now that I have opened my heart and written it all out in Motherhood Unexpected, I'm struggling to return to short blog posts in which I can NOT make up elaborate plots and fun characters (where's the fun in that?) not to mention unable to truly discuss a big issue. (btw...thank you for the continued good feedback! I am so thankful to all of you for giving my book a chance and for so sweetly letting me know how much you loved it. Seriously...I just love all of you.)

I don't want this blog to be about over-sharing my children in a way that would embarrass them later in life. I don't want this blog to be a stay-at-home mom whining about first world problems. I don't want to pretend to be an expert a life as I preach to you the WAY TO DO ALL THINGS. Because I am not that person, I don't like to whine, and I want to protect my children any way I can.

I have been reevaluating the things I write and the reason I write them, and I haven't come up with any good answers as to the reason I must stay a blogger.

So I have wondered a lot lately if my blogging chapter should be closed.

But then...

I know that I enjoy showing first hand what life with Down syndrome is like. I know that I love to share what I am learning along the way in not only motherhood but in mothering a child with special needs. I know that I love to write, write, and write some more (I feel the word "addicted" would be appropriate here). I know that sometimes putting together a blog post of my day is the brightest spot in it. I know that I LOVE to connect with all of you.

But then again...

Facebook hides a lot of my posts these days, and it is extremely frustrating to spend a lot of time writing something that nobody sees (hello? anyone there?). Instagram is a great place to post quick thoughts and my favorite pictures. A quick status update is easier for you to read and much easier for me to write.

So blogging? Is it a thing of the past?

I don't know.

Thus the soul searching.

I mean really, mundane motherhood stuff is just NOT THAT INTERESTING. I can't believe you all have been reading my drivel for 5 years (gasp. FIVE YEARS?)

And yet-- I have never been more proud of anything than the difference I have made here on my blog when it comes to life with a child with Down syndrome. This is important work, and I have treated both the topic and my writing of it quite seriously. I love that our journey has helped others through theirs. I love that our story and perspective has brought new light to the perspectives of others. I love that sharing Addison in this way has helped the world not only love her but understand her (I use "the world" rather loosely...but you know what I mean).

See? I am torn.

I don't really have any great answers to my questions. I am just sharing the reason for some of my silence both here and on my various social media sites. I believe strongly-- if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. So sometimes I stay quiet because I don't have something constructive to share (sick children combined with a long winter tends to drag me down to this spot). And when I reach this spot I wonder if maybe it's time for me to bow out of this blogging gig and live a quiet and gracious life mothering my brood without writing about it?

I guess I'm asking-- what sort of things would you like to see written on this blog? Or what sort of things have you enjoyed reading about in the past on this blog?

I want to be helpful. I want to be constructive. And maybe I can figure this out if you can tell me what it is that has helped/entertained you the most in the past on this blog.

What topics would you want to see covered if I continue blogging here on Everything and Nothing from Essex?


Like peanut butter on the fingers of a curious toddler, this post is begging to be shared.

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