Thursday, January 13, 2011

I'm just a normal mom


Once upon a time, I thought that because I was now having a baby with Down syndrome, that my life would be a life of constant discouragement and hardship because of the Down syndrome. Well, as it turns out, Down syndrome and I have had our ups and downs- all of them concluding with the fact that bottom line I love my daughter.

But honestly, at times life is hard and it has absolutely nothing to do with Down syndrome or health problems. Sometimes life is hard because I'm a terrible friend or I have a student warn me to watch carefully when I cross the street because he's so angry with me or I overload a free weekend so that I have a four day weekend and start it off stressed out.

See, even Addison has it out for me. lol.
Sometimes my daughter, possessing Down syndrome, is the best and brightest thing in my life. It's ironic, really. once I thought that it would always be the black spot in my life. Now, my daughter is my source of comfort:
Yeah, her kisses may feel a lot like bites, but they are still kisses....I'll take that.(-:

I'm getting her official one year pictures this weekend and I'm nervous because I'm actually paying money for them and I want them to turn out perfectly- also, I can't decide on an outfit for her to wear. I want a ruffled mini skirt with attached leggings, but I can't find it anywhere here in town.

I'm throwing a very small birthday dinner party for Aaron on Saturday and I have already changed the menu three times- simply can't decide. Maybe dust with a side of crumbled puffs on the floor. (that's ready now.)

I'm playing in a new quintet for several hours tomorrow night, and my endurance is not up to par and I have no reeds.

I'm subbing for my coworker at his church on Sunday as pianist/choir director/offertory/music person. It's stressing me out, but hey, it's what's paying for Addison's one year photos.

I'm annoyed with the world and freezing cold.

There- a whole list of hardships that have absolutely nothing to do with Down syndrome or having the label "special needs mom".

I'm just a normal mom. with normal problems. normal tears. normal complaining. normal feeling sorry for myself.

But like any normal mom, you know what makes me feel better? Thinking about my beautiful baby who smiles at me and reaches out for me when she sees me. Watching her sleep, her chubbs legs wrapped around her teddy bear and her little hands grasping her blanket.

Cuddling with her, seeing her watch me with wide, blue eyes that stare at me with absolute trust and love.

Yes, I'm just a normal mom.

Now I'm going to go finish my normal pity party....with a tub of normal fudge sauce that a student gave me today (not the student that threatened my life...in case you were wondering).

Happy normal Thursday night to you.



2 comments:

  1. LOL...Did you really have a student tell you be careful crossing the road!! Ha ha...holy crap! Love the pictures of you and Addison, she looks so sweet giving you a kiss :)

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  2. Yep normal here too...sink overflowing with dishes, laundry undone, haven't seen the kitchen counter in weeks because it's so piled with stuff...

    ps Claire is really good at sharpening her tooth on my chin too!

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