Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Not up for Adoption

I wasn't going to post tonight.

I have posted a lot this week and I am exhausted.

Note to self: Subbing an entire day for a coworker then attempting to come home and make and decorate 6 dozen cut out sugar cookies and address 50 Christmas cards- very, very bad idea.

Anyway, where was I, oh yes, exhausted and wasn't going to post.

But then I had a conversation with my husband that was so profound, I had to share it before it slipped out of my tired little mind.

This week we have gotten a lot of snow, and my snow tires are set to be put on next week, so yes, Aaron has been sweetly driving me to work and back every day so far this week. What a knight in shining snow tired armor.

Today on the ride home, we were discussing the fundraiser on my friend Patti's blog.

While we were on Reese's Rainbow donating to Olga and checking out donation totals, we both found ourselves drawn to look at pictures of other orphans.

Children, abandoned because they were born with an extra chromosome. These children are tended in an orphanage until they turn 5. Once they reach their 5th birthday, they are sent to a mental institution and life becomes very hard, to put it mildly. They are virtually unloved and many of them don't survive very long after this transition.

It is tragic to look at these children's faces. The natural response is to feel guilty, wondering how we can do more to help, wishing that we were in a financial place to adopt another special baby and raise that baby alongside Chubbs.

We were both pondering these thoughts and talking about how cute these babies were on Reese's Rainbow when my husband said something so profound I am still reeling from the simplistic truth.

He said, "I am so thankful that Addison was born to us and not to one of these families who don't care and would have abandoned her. I am so thankful that Addison is in our family instead of a picture on Reese's Rainbow. God knew that we would take care of her, love her, and give her the best life possible. He knew that by giving her to us she would be in a family where she could thrive and do whatever she set her mind to."

Those who read my posts on a regular basis know that I still have moments of struggle with being the mom of a special needs child (Exhibit A: yesterday's post).

But to think of it from this new perspective was mind boggling.

"I'm thankful that Addison was born to us instead of to one of those families who don't care"

Addison was placed in our family very carefully. It was no mistake.

God provided us with excellent insurance and then gave us a baby who would wring that insurance company dry. He set us up to perfectly take care of Addison. He has planned out every step of the way long before we got there.

I am amazed and thankful for the provision and support of my heavenly father. He gave me Addison. I didn't have to pay thousands of dollars and fly across the world to get my greatest gift. She was placed right in my arms and was 100% mine from the day she was born.

I am so grateful. The thought of my baby being one of those struggling to be brought into a loving family brings me to absolute tears. No, I can't help every one of those babies and my contribution in the big picture is very small. But I can take care of Chubbs and recognize that that is where my mission starts.

I still wish that I could do more to help these other babies, but now when I think of these sad stories, I now am also thankful

That Addison isn't one of those sad stories.

Because God gave her to us, and He gave us the strength and ability to take care and love her.


Also, thank you so much to all of you who have visited Patti's blog and helped contribute to Olga's fund! It is growing because of all of you and you all represent something else that I am extremely thankful for!


  1. So right Deanna! God makes no mistakes and He always supplies His grace to help us through the difficult times...


  2. I have thought of this too...I always hug Russell a little closer and hold him a little longer, knowing that if he had been born to another Mother who didnt love him as much as I he might have suffered, breaks my heart...Or if he had been born in another country he could be one of those faces on RR. I cant even bare the thought of it!
    I too still struggle at times about the Ds and stuff that comes with it, but never, ever, to love Russell. I am glad he chose me, I am glad he is ours, and I am glad God is giving me the strength and courage day by day to do what I need to do. We are very blessed.

  3. Oh I couldn't agree more with your husbands words...if God didn't choose families like yours then there would be even more precious miracles waiting for a family to adopt them. I am so grateful that God didn't make Addison or my Emily wait for their forever families...he placed them right into their mothers arms where He knew they would stay!

  4. this is a wonderful post. thank you.

    A meeting was held quite far from Earth

    It was time again for another birth.

    Said the Angels to the Lord above –

    “This special child will need much love.

    “Her progress may be very slow

    “Accomplishment she may not show.

    “And she'll require extra care

    “From the folks she meets down there.

    “She may not run or laugh or play

    “Her thoughts may seem quite far away

    “So many times she will be labeled

    “'different,' 'helpless' and disabled.

    “So, let's be careful where she's sent.

    “We want her life to be content.

    “Please, Lord, find the parents who

    “Will do a special job for you.

    “They will not realize right away

    “The leading role they are asked to play.

    “But with this child sent from above

    “Comes stronger faith, and richer love.

    “And soon they'll know the privilege given

    “In caring for their gift from heaven.

    “Their precious charge, so meek and mild

    “Is heaven's very special child.”

  5. Your husband is too sweet! I think our husbands would be great friends if we only lived closer to each other:) Thank you so so much for posting this- we are going to save a little girl because of OUR little girls opening our eyes to what is happening in Eastern Europe. My husband and I were just saying last night- maybe this is one of the reasons God gave us Lily- because He knew we would raise our voices for the children on Reece's Rainbow.
    Thank you again to Chubb's Grampa. Every time I go back and read his comment on Lily's blog I cry. You are blessed!!

  6. Deanna, you, and Patti and Jenny and your husbands and families are true leaders. Your love and diligent care is an example to every parent of what parental love SHOULD be.I am also typing this with tears in my eyes, and we are planning to give today to Olga's fund. I hope she can come home soon.

  7. My husband and I just recently had this same conversation. Lily is such a joy to us and we just can't imagine not having her in our lives. While I pray that every child on Reece's Rainbow finds a home, my ultimate prayer would be that there would be no need for RR at all because God has touched the hearts of these people in other countries. But then...I also pray that He would touch the hearts of so many right here in the USA who choose to throw away the lives of their unborn children.

    Come, Lord Jesus, Come.



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